Baby bug
by Danym
Summary: Grissom and Sara are finally able to move forward while babysitting a little girl. Sequel to "Baby lotion" [GSR, Complete]
1. Baby Bug

Baby bug

By Dany

Summary: Grissom decides to actually go and visit the park. But he doesn't want to go alone.

A/N: This is part of a continuing story and follows "Baby lotion". This time it's no response to a challenge. It would be good if read the other two parts (Baby powder & Baby lotion) if you haven't already or you probably won't understand this.  
Please let me know what you think. Tell me if I'm on the right track or if you don't like where this is going. Thanks!  
Disclaimer: I don't own CSI.

xxxxx

Grissom picked up the phone for the hundredth time today. And for the hundredth time he hung up again before dialing.

It shouldn't be so hard, after all it was just business. But that was exactly the problem.

He felt like there was another reason why he wanted to do this.

And that reason had a pair of beautiful brown eyes and an irresistible smile. What was it about her? He should stay away – he couldn't handle two of them in his life.

In that moment, he realized he had just answered his own question.

What was it about her? She looked like a miniature version of Sara.

And if he couldn't spend time with the real thing… But this would not help him at all. It only made him realize that he had to do something.

His mind made up he left his office in search for Sara

xxxxx

He found her in the AV-lab, going over some video evidence with Archie. "How's the case going?"

Both of them looked up, but only Sara answered him. "We're trying to get a clearer picture of the perp's face, but so far, no such luck."

He nodded, going over the evidence in his head, trying to determine whether they had enough to get a conviction with out a headshot. "Well, we've got his prints and the identification by the clerk. That has to be enough if you can't get a clear picture."

The implication of course was that only an objective identification through the camera could ensure a 100 chance of conviction. Sara and Archie knew that and acknowledged it with a nod.

"Sara?" She turned her head back to him while Archie played with the controls some more. "Could I talk to you in my office when you're done here, please?"

Sara looked a bit confused and for a moment he thought she would refuse, but then she agreed. "Sure!"

Satisfied with her response, he left, wanting to go check up on Greg to see how far his DNA results were. Hopefully, he was not listening to that trash again.

xxxxx

The knock startled him out of his thoughts – about work this time – and made him sit up. He called whoever it was in, hoping it was Sara.

The door opened and indeed Sara stepped in hesitantly. Grissom closed the files and pulled off his glasses, motioning for her to take a seat.

"What did you want to discuss?" The wheels in her brain where obviously turning as she was trying to figure out what she had done, or not done.

"It's uhm, not so much about what I want to discuss. It's more about me asking you for a favor." He wanted to forget about everything when he stumbled, trying to find the right words.

But looking at Sara he knew he had said too much. There was no way out, but the one straight ahead. "You remember the visit of Mrs. Knightley?"

Sara had relaxed a bit, seeing that this conversation would not be about her or her work performance. "Yes, with the little girl that stole your bug," she smirked at him.

"Tiger Beetle," he corrected her. "Well, the invitation she extended… It would be a chance to see most of the native species at once. And now that the case has been to court, I could take the Knightleys up on their offer."

Sara cocked her head to one side the question 'and how does that relate to me' written all over her face.

His hands were fiddling with his glasses while he searched for a way to express his thoughts without it sounding like a too big a thing. "I was thinking that maybe you would want to accompany me to exemplify your entomological knowledge for crime scenes."

Now, tense and apprehensive of her reaction, he looked over at Sara. Her eyes were narrowing. She was thinking – probably whether there was a hidden meaning, a hidden request.

Of course there was. Several actually, but she didn't need to know this.

Sara was an extremely inquisitive person – which contributed to her being a good CSI – and she would keep looking until she checked every angle. But maybe, just maybe she would let it go for once.

And for the time being she did. "Studies? When were you planning on going?"

"Whenever you have time." He wanted to be considerate, to show her he would follow her lead, so he put the decision on her.

That threw Sara a bit. "Just… just pick a day and time." He had caught her on the wrong foot and it showed.

"How about tomorrow? I know you're off and that way you could get some sleep before or after we go to the park."

"Whatever suits you," Sara remained uncooperative, which really irked Grissom. Here he was, trying to make the effort to be considerate and mindful of her wishes and she was not giving him any ground.

"Sara?" He felt his pulse raising, hoping it would _not_ go up to 95. What was it about this woman?

"What?" At this point he asked himself if she was doing this on purpose. Maybe to see how far he would go.

All right, he thought, she had it coming. "Yes or no, Sara. No, we won't go. Yes, pick me up at 3 tomorrow?" He steeled himself, thinking she would lash out at him because of his not so friendly question.

To his big surprise she smiled at him, getting up, saying, "I'll be waiting," before leaving his office.

TBC  
Next part: Baby…?


	2. Baby Sitting

Baby sitting 

(Part 4 of the Baby series)

By Dany

Summary: Grissom and Sara actually do make it to the park, but something unexpected is waiting for them.

A/N: I decided to put the rest of the story in one site, but the first two parts remain seperate, since they were originally written for an Unbound Challenge.

xxxx

Grissom picked up Sara at three on the dot.

Sara was already waiting and pacing the floor to control her impatience. When the door bell rang she was relieved that he had not changed his mind.

Opening the door she saw Grissom take a step back and look at her. It felt good to know that he was not unaffected by her appearance. She had chosen to wear casual clothes, but they were a little more revealing than what she usually preferred. And… it seemed like she had accomplished her goal – to draw Grissom out from behind his wall, at least a bit.

The drive was mostly spent in silence, punctuated only by two or three attempts of casual conversation. Sara couldn't tell if he was really that uncomfortable or if it was something else. Shyness perhaps?

The office building of the park was situated just outside the entrance of the park, so they went in there first. Grissom told her that he had talked to Patrick Knightley briefly on the phone. The impression he had gotten was very favorable. He had, like his wife, expressed his gratitude to Grissom for being an important part in the recovery of their daughter. And he had talked about his park. It seemed to be a passion for him, not just an investment, which impressed Grissom. He had not voiced this feeling, but Sara could tell by the recognizing inflection in his voice.

Having heard about the phone call as they mounted the steps to the second floor where the office was located, she really wanted to meet the man as well.

Knocking on the office door that simply read 'Patrick Knightley', they were called in. There was no secretary or outer office, only the man behind his desk.

"Patrick Knightley," he greeted them. "It's nice to meet you. Thank you for coming, Dr. Grissom." He stepped from behind the desk and first shook Grissom's hand before holding out the hand for Sara.

"Sara Sidle," she smiled at him before looking at Grissom for an introduction.

"I told you about the friend I would bring along," Grissom said, keeping his eyes on Mr. Knightley, seemingly unaware of what he had done.

Sara, though, was standing rooted in place, eyes wide, staring at Grissom. A friend… he hadn't called her that since she had arrived in Las Vegas. First his unusual offer, the once-over and now this. What did that mean?

The two men carried on their conversation as if nothing happened while Sara just stood there, struck mute. She vaguely remembered hearing something about them having to go through the park alone because of a business meeting, but the rest of the conversation was lost to her.

When they were about to leave the office, the door opened suddenly and Alexandra Knightley breezed in with Amelia in a stroller. "Oh, I'm sorry," she stammered, looking flustered that she had barged in on a meeting. "I didn't mean to interrupt."

"Alex, I thought you had a course?" Her husband walked over to her, lifting their daughter out of her seat.

"I do, but the babysitter just called in sick and I haven't been able to reach you."

Grissom and Sara felt visibly uncomfortable to be witnesses to a private conversation and decided to leave the room quietly. But as they passed the young couple, Amelia looked up straight at Grissom before breaking out into a grin. Her hand reached out and gripped one of his jacket lapels.

"I can't take her Alex. I have an investors meeting in 20 minutes." Patrick Knightley looked at his wife pleadingly, willing her to understand his dilemma.

Grissom, held in place by the little girl, still looked every bit as uncomfortable as he probably felt, but the Amelia didn't seem to care. She tightened her grip and pulled herself closer, leaning over to Grissom, squirming in her father's arms.

When he was thrown slightly off-balance by his daughter's movements he looked down on her and saw that she was trying to leave his arms.

Sara watched the whole scene from the door with interest, wondering where this might be leading.

"I know," Alexandra Knightley sighed. "But I can't drop the course again. And your parents are out of town."

Her husband moved away, wanting to go to his desk, but Amelia's grip was tight. "Ammi, let go." When she didn't he looked apologetically at Grissom. "Could you…?"

Grissom nodded and Amelia was passed to him.

Mr. Knightley made a quick phone call, but not with the desired results. He had tried to rearrange the meeting, but to no avail. "Alex…"

"Why don't we take your daughter with us to see the park?" Sara gaped at Grissom, wondering where the man was she worked with every night. But he seemed just as surprised by what he had offered.

The Knightleys looked at each other, carrying on a silent communication, discussing what they should do. It was crazy, everyone knew that. They barely knew each other and they couldn't know whether the two CSIs were able to take care of Amelia.

Hell, Sara didn't know if they could.

But the couple seemed to trust them. Amelia had shown no fear so far, instead being more open towards the scientist than she usually was and that seemed enough.

"I'll be gone at least two hours. More like two and a half," Mrs. Knightley seemed to have made her decision.

"The meeting should not take more than two hours, but you never know." Since both parents agreed to leave their child to the CSIs, it was up to Sara to make the final decision. She had remained quiet so far and now everyone was looking at her.

But she had only eyes for Grissom, admiring the view of him handling the child so carefully – again. Maybe this was her chance.

He seemed so different around this little girl. The hard shell seemed to crack and he was able to leave 'Grissom, CSI-supervisor and stone wall' behind.

"I'll give you my cell phone number," she smiled at Grissom, willing to go and see what would happen.

TBC


	3. Baby Bird

Baby bird

By Dany

Summary: Grissom and Sara discover the enclosure and what a curious girl Amelia is.

A/N: Sorry for the delay. Next time I'll try to upload sooner. Hope someone's still reading this and hasn't given up yet.

xxxxx

Packed with some last minute instructions at childcare, Grissom and Sara entered the park, pushing the stroller in front of them.

After a quick look at the outlay of the park they had decided to take the right path to the insect house. On the way they would pass some other enclosures that would be interesting for the little girl. It was the shorter path and when they were finished with the insect house and still had some time left they could always explore the rest of the park.

They followed the way to a huge aviary where a sign announced that you would find most of the birds native in Nevada in several single enclosures.

Amelia seemed to know the park by heart, because she turned in her seat, eyes wide and glistening with excitement, and said, "Hakz!"

Stunned by the little girls knowledge, Sara only nodded. Amelia faced the entrance again and Grissom went and opened the door for Sara to enter.

As she walked past him she brushed against Grissom. She heard his sharp intake of breath and felt herself blush, lowering her head to hide that fact. Her only consolation was that Grissom didn't seem to be faring much better.

Trying to forget the tension that had sprung up between them, they worked their way from board to board looking over the amounts of information that was given to the visitor.

The little girl was less scientific than the adults and bounce in the stroller every time she saw a bird moving. The excitement of the little girl slowly seemed to reach the CSIs as they started to see the world through different eyes.

By the time they had reached the enclosure with the hawks they had relaxed enough to look at each other again.

"Out!" Sara saw Amelia struggling with the straps that held her down.

"Out!" The girl looked directly at Grissom, showing him the tears of frustration in her eyes. And it were exactly those tears that crumbled any resistance he might have had so he bent down to free her of the restraints and lift her up.

Amelia quieted immediately and gave Grissom a wide smile, which resulted in an answering smile from him.

For Sara, this _study_ was far more interesting than anything else could be. To see Grissom so open and unguarded was a very rare treat and she wanted to take in every second.

While she was lost in her observations, Grissom had turned towards the enclosure and pointed out the hawks for Amelia to see.

"Hakz!" She seemed enthralled although the birds were just sitting on a branch moving nothing but head.

"I don't understand it," Grissom heard Sara mutter and turned his head to raise an eyebrow in question. Her eyes grew wide, only now realizing that she had spoken aloud. "I didn't mean to," she stammered, but when Grissom's eyes squinted in confusion she elaborated. "I was just wondering how unusual it is for such a small child to get more excited about a brown unmoving bird when there are so many others, more colorful, moving, attracting the eye."

Grissom contemplated her statement, watching Amelia admire these majestic birds before turning back to Sara, trying to explain. But this time he had no concrete answer. He knew too little about children to come to a conclusion so he opted tell her the truth. "I don't know either. But she seems to have different interest than what we picture _normal_ children to do."

He was thinking about the beetle Amelia had slipped from his pocket and by the look on Sara's face she was thinking about that too.

"Hakz," Amelia called again, drawing the attention back to her. She was pointing to the next cage, which – according to the board – held two Cooper's Hawks, different from the Red-Tailed Hawk they looked at before.

They followed her wish and moved over so that she could see the other hawks. This time the birds were barely visible in the branches, only their eyes moving.

"Hakz?" The question was clear in the little girls voice.

Grissom tried to point them out for her, but she could not follow his outstretched arm accurately and her eyes kept straying, searching for a hawk.

Sara saw Grissom get restless, fearful that the girl might cry if she couldn't find the unmoving fellow. Carefully she stepped up behind Grissom, calling Amelia as though not to startle her.

Lightly she took Amelia's head between her hands and turned it so that it was facing directly towards the bird. To verify her angle she stepped even closer, brushing against Grissom again.

Her gaze wavered from its target and sought out Grissom's. She stared into his eyes, completely forgetting her surrounding, drowning in a sea of blue. She could see the emotion swirling around like a cloud and her hope rose that they could fix IT. What ever IT was.

Both of them had blended out the presence of another human being until they were loudly reminded when Amelia found the hawk and screeched, "Der, Hak!" She clapped her hands and bounced in Grissom's arms.

Seeing the girl so happy made both of them smile involuntarily, freeing them from the tension momentarily.

TBC


	4. Baby Teeth

Baby teeth

By Dany

Summary: The next enclosure holds some surprises for Grissom

A/N: I wrote this before the reviews of the last chapter came in, so sorry that I can't come up with an old couple, but this is my poor attempt at a supstitute. And on that note, thanks for the feedback, keep it coming.

xxxxx

Their good mood continued as they left the aviary, wandering to the next little world.

Grissom was still carrying Amelia while Sara was pushing the stroller, admiring the view. He seemed like a completely different person. The tension that usually accompanied him, stemming from his stressful position as supervisor, had lessened to a degree she hadn't seen in a while. Not since before Vegas.

He told her he had a diversion, but seeing him today she began to doubt that. Maybe his diversion was not as good as he believed.

Reaching the next area, she shook herself out of her thoughts and hurried to catch up with Amelia and Grissom.

"Inside or outside," he asked her, wondering where they would get more to see since there were some smaller outer areas and a big house for the rodents.

"Let's go in." He agreed with a nod and opened the door for her.

The inside was a bit darker than the outside, but not so much that she would bump into anyone with the stroller.

"Sara, would you mind if we switched. My arms are getting tired and if we put her in the stroller she won't be able to see everything." Grissom was one of the few men who were not wounded in their pride by admitting they couldn't do everything or carry on indefinitely. That's not to say he didn't have his moments. Everyone had them – She did.

She held out her arms waiting for him to place the little girl in them, suddenly feeling a bit apprehensive. What if she started to fuss, or even worse, to cry? Maybe Amelia didn't want to be held by her. Maybe…

And then she felt the weight in her arms and her eyes shifted downward to make sure the girl was ok. She was not making any noise and there was no trace of tears. Instead, she seemed to settle comfortably into Sara's arms and then looked over to the first glass window.

A short glance at Grissom told her that he had been oblivious to her predicament, staring at the same window Amelia was looking at. So she made her way over to see what animal was behind it.

'Lodgepole Chipmunk' the sign declared, which she read aloud for the girl, before actually looking through the glass.

At first there was only an empty enclosure, but when she remained unmoving a little nose appeared from one of the holes in a tree trunk. The nose was moving up and down, feeling the air with its whiskers. Carefully one of the little fellows eased out of the hole and hopped over to a bowl of fresh food that sat close to the window.

So as not to startle the chipmunk, Sara moved closer to the window, bending down to make sure Amelia got a good look at the chipmunk.

Surprisingly, the small animal only looked up for a moment, before going back to the bowl and picking up a nut. The little teeth became visible when it started to nibble on it.

Amelia started giggling and bared her own big front teeth, turning to look at Sara.

When the shell was cracked open, the chipmunk took the nut out and turned back to the bowl, dropping the shell and picking up a berry, stuffing it also into its mouth.

"Crk, Crk!" Amelia imitated the animal and coupled with her facial motions, the teeth biting on an imaginary nut was so funny that it made Sara laugh.

"Oh why, you're a little chipmunk. Aren't you," she teased, bouncing the girl on her hip.

The movement caused the little rodent to turn and scurry back into its hole.

"Crk, Crk!"

All the while, Grissom was standing a bit behind them, deciding to watch Sara interact with the child. Although she always claimed to be uncomfortable with children, she seemed to have lost her shyness right now.

"They really are a picture. How old is your little one?" The voice startled him and as he looked up, he saw an elderly man standing beside him. He looked friendly enough, but due to his profession Grissom was always weary.

"She's almost two," he said curtly, a bit angry with himself that he couldn't remember her exact age from the file.

The man nodded and they both kept watching Sara and Amelia. Just when the stranger was about to speak again, Sara turned and called Grissom over to them again, stating she wanted to see the other animals.

He followed the two around the house, but his thoughts always wandered back to where the man was still standing, looking straight ahead into the chipmunks' area. What had made him answer without correcting him?

"Griss, you're ok?" Sara asked, looking a bit worried. She had noticed his absent mindedness and wondered if she had done anything to make him uncomfortable again.

"I'm fine." The look on her face told him that she didn't quite believe him, but she let it go.

"Let's put her back in the stroller and continue on."

TBC


	5. Baby Talk

Baby talk

By Dany

Summary: The insect house reveals some very interesting truths.

xxxxx

The enclosures between the rodent world and the insect house were outer areas and all of them were constructed so that even small children could see inside.

Amelia remained patiently in her stroller, admiring the animals. Grissom tried not to let it show that his mind was wandering a different path by talking to the girl, explaining everything he knew about the animal at hand. A lot of adults would have been bored, but Amelia obviously liked to listen to Grissom's smooth voice, a trait she had in common with Sara.

They listened without interrupting him once until they reached the insect house.

Amelia began to squirm again, but this time it was not out of excitement. Sara noticed her restlessness and called out for Grissom. "I think Amelia needs something to drink. And maybe some crackers, too."

"Maybe there's a bench in there like in the other house." When Sara agreed with a nod they entered and started looking for one. In front of the mantis' terrarium they found a quiet spot to nourish the child. Her mother had packed a bag for her daughter and they found a bottle of tea and some butter crackers.

The girl reached for the offered goods and bit into the cracker before pushing the bottle on her mouth. The bottle stayed in her mouth until Sara was sure the cracker was already dissolving.

After she had made sure the girl wouldn't choke on her cracker, Sara took the chance and turned to Grissom, seeing an opportunity to finally talk to him away from everything. "Why don't we talk anymore?" Her voice was low and full of emotion.

At first, he kept looking straight ahead, showing no response, but after a minute of silence he answered. "We _do_ talk," he insisted, but when there was no reaction from Sara he knew he had to be honest – with her and himself. "Because I made it uncomfortable."

And he realized he had. Sara had always been there, willing to take what he gave and he had let his own feelings, his fears, take a hold of them both.

He could feel her gaze on him, but he wasn't sure if she wanted him to explain or if she was about to say something.

She did. "_We_ made it uncomfortable. I'm as much to blame. Maybe even more." She kept looking at him and wondered for the millionth time why he was making things so hard.

"I shouldn't have expected so much. I didn't want to be satisfied with what we had…" She wanted to continue, but her vocal cords locked and she couldn't speak anymore. The onset of tears was choking her up, which she fought of course.

Their silence spoke volumes as both tried to figure out how to apologize and fix it.

Sara was thinking about how to go back to where they had been, thinking Grissom was not ready and might never be, while Grissom wanted to show her that it was not only she who wanted to move forward.

It was Sara who broke the silence, although she hadn't come up with a solution yet. "So…we're both to blame. And if we want to talk to each other again, we _both_ need to work on 'this'."

When they looked in each other's eyes, they were able to see the determination obvious in their opponent. A silent pact was made to do what Sara had proposed: 'work on this'.

The sound of Amelia's bottle hitting the floor made them break the gaze and focus on her again. She was showing a renewed interest in the animals that surrounded her and was squirming, wanting to get closer to see the preying mantis in front of them.

"So," Sara said while standing up to lift Amelia out of her seat, "do you want to tell me about all of your little friends or just the ones we can find in the vicinity of a dead body?"

Grissom picked up the baby bottle that had rolled to his side and put it back into the bag. Smiling he looked up at Sara who was now holding the child so that Amelia could look through the windows.

He was always surprised that she was _always_ willing to listen to his verbal excursions. And her attention never wavered, whether it was relevant or not.

"We can look at the terraria and you can ask me when you want to know something." He was a bit disappointed when she shook her head, fearing that she already had enough of his company.

But he was wrong in his assessment, because Sara was not the least bit tired of him. On the contrary, she wanted to hear him speak. "No, I want you to tell me about them. I…"

She debated with herself if this was a wise idea to step over the line of friendship that they had just reclaimed. "When you share your knowledge with me, I feel…special, because you're giving me a gift. A part of you."

She blushed heavily, thinking about how stupid that sounded. But for her, him teaching her meant spending time together and getting to know him through the only way he let anyone get close to him. That was why she always to be his prize student; to be closer to him than anyone else.

She turned back to another cage, pointing out the insect to Amelia, while waiting for a reaction.

TBC

Please review!


	6. Baby Smell

Baby Smell

By Dany

Summary: What's worse than a decomp?

A/N: Thanks to all those who are supporting me by reviewing. One of you gave me and idea and I hope I put it into words to your liking.

xxxxx

Her words sank in slowly, but they did.

They reached not only his brain, but also his heart. And for the first time, he understood why Sara was never inattentive during his lectures.

She was right. Knowledge – this was the only part he gave freely, without hesitation, without any fears that someone might get too close. And knowledge was something he gave mainly to Sara.

Sure, he tried to further everyone if they asked the right questions, but Sara was different. She really took it in, into her heart. That way he would be, could be close to her.

Maybe he had misjudged her investment in this.

"You're looking at a Argia agrioides, a Californian Dancer. The male is blue, but at first its color is brown…" And so they wandered from species to species, looking at the small descriptions, checking if the information was correct and seeing if there was everything the insects needed.

Sara listened raptly, trying to store everything away for future use.

Amelia seemed to be listening also, following his explanations and her questions. Sometimes she interrupted them by cooing "beet" or "bug" and to his surprise Grissom found pleasure in trying to teach the girl some of the easier names.

Whatever he pronounced for her she tried to imitate. Some of the letter combinations that came out of Amelia's mouth were too funny, even for the usually reserved and controlled CSIs so they burst out laughing.

They were almost through the whole insect house when Amelia began to squirm again. Sara looked at her and saw her face tight with concentration. "Uhm, Grissom," she stammered, waiting for him to turn his attention away from the current species and direct it towards her.

"I think we just got ourselves a decomp," she tried to joke, but Grissom was clueless as to what she meant. It was somehow reassuring that when things became serious, Grissom was just like any other man.

But then he surprised her – again. The lines of thought on his forehead eased up as recognition set in. "I think I saw a sign for a changing room in the back." He nodded in silent confirmation to himself and pushed the stroller in that direction. Relieved they saw that Grissom was right.

The only problem was, the changing table was in the ladies room. And Sara was not sure if she knew how to do this right.

The last – and first and only – time she had changed a diaper was as a teenager in her parents' B&B. One of their guests had left her alone with her screaming brat. Everything had gone wrong and had left her with the decision that she was not cut out for taking care of children.

She looked to Grissom for help, but she could tell that he was even more uncomfortable. The park was not exactly full and the insect house was empty beside them. Satisfied that they were alone, she pushed Grissom through the door.

"Sara, what…" But he didn't get any further when he turned and saw the determined look on her face. He sighed, knowing there was no way to escape this and pulled a disposable case for the pad out of a machine before placing Amelia on it.

Slowly he began to undress her while Sara rummaged in the bag for a new diaper. Amelia tried to turn several times, but Grissom soon found the right way to hold her with one hand so that he could work on the buttons. When she was twisting her upper body again, loudly voicing her displeasure, a plush ladybug appeared in his field of vision.

Sara held out the toy for the little girl, which distracted her from squirming. "Here!" She held out the fresh diaper for Grissom as he was tying to dispose of the old one.

"Tissues first," he commanded and Sara began to go through the bag again.

This time she found it faster and as she handed him the box she grimaced and asked, "Mind if I wait outside?"

His hands stilled and he looked up completely stunned, momentarily forgetting his task. "Oh no, _you_ pushed me in here, so you stay." He was all serious, making it clear that it was not up for discussion and Sara ducked her head to avoid his intense gaze.

"Besides," he continued, "you have smelled worse."

Her eyes flew up to his, wide in surprise. Was this an insult or a mere statement of fact?

As so often, his facial expression betrayed nothing. She decided to take it as the latter and quipped back, "Got lemons?"

His bemused smile was the only answer she got.

TBC


	7. Baby steps

Baby Steps

By Dany

Summary: Sometimes trying is not going to be enough.

A/N: This is the last part of my 'Babies series'. I'm working on a sequel, but I can't promise anything. Please tell me what you think.

xxxxx

After the crisis had been averted, they had returned to the main room to finish the tour. Grissom had let Sara finish dressing Amelia while he disposed of the diaper and the used tissues and washed his hands – without lemons.

Amelia was placed in his arms again to relieve Sara. He was steadily getting used to their 'arrangement'. Never would he have thought that he could get this comfortable taking care of a child, but it was easier with someone else to share the responsibility.

That didn't mean his overall opinion that he better keep his distance – until now only with the exception of Lindsey – had changed. But right now, this was nice.

"Have her parents called yet?" He asked Sara, knowing all good things had to come to an end.

She fumbled for her cell phone and shook her head negating her answer at the empty display.

"Then let's continue, shall we?" This time he got a positive response and they continued to go through the house.

When they were done and Grissom found the exhibition more than satisfactory, they returned to the bench they had first stopped to give Amelia some tea.

The little girl was packed into her stroller again and Sara was just about to turn to the exit when Grissom held her back.

He motioned for her to sit down again and she followed his request with a stunned look on her face. "Sara, about what you said…" he trailed off and left her wondering where this was going as he took some time to recollect himself.

"I wanted to make it clear that…expecting a relationship – any relationship – to be in a flux is _not_ wrong." He paused again, but didn't give her the chance to interrupt him.

"It is a wrong assumption, though," her heart stopped at that moment, thinking that he would end everything here and now, "to rely on the static of one. That is what I have been doing. I deluded myself into thinking that as long as we stopped advancing our friendship then everything would be alright."

She didn't know if her heart had started again or if she was already dead. She could not tell, since all her thoughts were circling in her head as she was desperately trying to figure out what that meant. Grissom was just being his usual cryptic self so she wasn't really angry. Tired, was more like it. Disappointed, maybe.

"And what does that mean?" For once, she wanted the truth as clear and non-misunderstandable answer, making it clear in her voice.

And she had a feeling that her chances for that would never be better than now. He was surrounded by the things he loved, away from work, away from the people he knew and the only ones who would ever know was she herself and a little girl.

"Please, I need to know," she pleaded when no answer came forward.

One look at him told her he was still thinking, so she tried to give him time, busying herself with Amelia. The girl's sweet face made her heart a bit lighter, but most of her attention was still with Grissom.

He was not really aware of the two people next to him, too deep in thoughts. He hadn't planned for this to go that far, but he should have known better to believe that Sara would let it go so easily. And now he had to decide just how much he was willing to give. How far did he want to go?

Slowly he came back to reality and was shocked to discover that Sara was crying. She tried to hide it, turning away, not letting him see her face. But he had seen a glimpse of it.

Their initial plan to wait and see was obviously not going to work. Suddenly he wished he could _show_ her his emotions, like could so easily, but he had spend too much time pushing them back and locking them away. Besides, she probably needed to hear it.

"Sara," he reached out tentatively, resting his hand on her shoulder. He wanted to entangle his fingers in her hair, feel the soft skin of her cheek, wipe away the tears under her eyes, but he knew he didn't have the right to do that.

She still didn't look at him, but he continued, "I want to move forward. I'm just clueless how to do that. I…I don't know what to do."

At first, she didn't seem to react at all. When the words sunk in, a slight panic overwhelmed her. Where would this go? She took Amelia out of her stroller and put her on her lap.

That was not quite the reaction Grissom had expected.

She cuddled the little girl who was by now near tears as well, reacting to the adults' mood, and shushing her with a few soft words. Sara was afraid that if she hadn't taken Amelia she would have thrown herself at Grissom sobbing, breaking down completely. The day had worn her down, being with Grissom and the emotional tug-o-war had lowered her defenses.

Only when she looked into his eyes she saw the fear and realized she hadn't said anything to him. "I'm sorry," she rushed to reassure him.

"Grissom, I want to move forward, I think I made that only all too clear." Taking a deep breath she slid her fingers over Amelia's cheeks to make sure she was ok. The girl looked up, the tears gone from her eyes, but not quite smiling yet.

"I'll go at whatever pace you need and how far you want if only you promise not to block me out so completely again." She knew it was a lot she was asking, but she couldn't do this if he was going to throw a wall in her face at the next opportunity.

With obstacles she could deal. She was known for her tenacity.

He took his time again to reach a decision and Sara understood that he needed that.

They were staring ahead once more, not knowing what else to do.

"Da!" Amelia was the only one it seemed who knew what to do. She sat up, crawling from Sara's lap onto Grissom's and stared up at him with big brown eyes.

In that moment, he was reminded if the first time he had seen her and what he had felt. The tug in his heart, the feelings that had flooded him and the familiarity he had felt immediately.

Maybe this was a sign.

Usually he didn't believe in such things as signs an omen, but maybe he should start now. "Do you believe in signs," he asked, genuinely interested in her opinion.

Although it came out of the left field, Sara was used to his excursions so she humored him and answered. "Yeah, I do. I think sometimes we need a guiding hand and someone or something is lending us one."

He nodded, looking at Amelia. The child had listened and in an understanding of the word 'hand' she held out hers for Grissom to see.

Was that it? Another sign?

"I would like to try."

"That's not good enough." Her tone was regretful, wanting so much to believe in him.

His mouth tightened into a thin line. He was a bit hurt, but understood her need to protect herself.

Could he do it?

He closed his eyes and the first image that came to his mind was a crying Sara. "I promise!"

Sara looked up, seeking his eyes and reading the truth when he opened them again. She wiped away her remaining tears and smiled at him.

As he returned it he could feel Amelia's mood shift again along with theirs.

"Da," she clapped while Sara whispered, "Thank you."

The end


End file.
